- A reason to love the English language: "The insurance was invalid for the invalid."
- Scotty in Star Trek often says "You can't change the laws of physics." This is untrue. Chuck Norris can change the laws of physics. With his fists.
- When he forgot to itemize what he wanted at the grocery store he felt quite listless.
- If there's no INTEL INSIDE... it could work!
- Did you hear about the programmer who died while washing his hair? The instructions said, 'Lather, rinse, repeat.'
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